If you can’t tell I get way too attached to characters.

Especially when they’re my favorites.

And they’re part of one of my biggest otp’s ever. 

And then they die.

Are you talking about Lexie?

BECAUSE I DON’T WANT TO BE HAPPY FOR HER. SURE, MARK FINALLY TOLD HER THAT HE LOVES HER. BUT THEY NEVER GOT TO BE TOGETHER. THEY NEVER HAD THE LIFE THAT HE DESCRIBED. THEY NEVER GOT TO GET MARRIED, AND THEY NEVER GAVE SOFIA A SISTER AND TWO BROTHERS. SHE NEVER BECAME AN AMAZING SURGEON. THEY NEVER HAD THE BEST OF LIVES. BECAUSE SHE DIED. 

And a small, small part of me wished that Mark would die too. Because at least that way they’d be together. If Shonda decided to kill off one half of my otp, and one of my favorite characters, then why not kill all of it? Because at least then they’d be together again.

I’m going to die all over again next season, seeing Mark deal with her death. 

SHE DIED, AND HIS HEART STARTED TO BLEED. 

I think I started to ship them more because of that. *eternal creys*

And your new url is just too much, and your sidebar gif, and I can’t take it anymore. 

This is all my fault, isn’t it?

I don’t even know where to begin, my god. I think that John Winchester came back from the marines, and he found Mary. He fell in love. Hard. He’d do anything for her. He built a family with her, and he found a safety in her that he had probably never felt before. And that safety died with her. He saw her die, stuck on the cieling. He saw her light up on fire, without anyone starting that fire. He had his first encounter with the supernatural world when his wife died. 

I don’t think John felt truly safe after that. I think he tried, too much even. But he could never find peace, not even after killing YED. Too much was ripped from him. 

While trying to find a way to feel safe again, and find a way to avenge his wife, he had to balance his life with his sons. But he was desperate, and desperate people make mistakes. I don’t think it was his intention to treat his sons the way he did. But I also think that he was blind in a way. He didn’t see how much he hurt them by being desperate. 

John Winchester is a great character. Jeffery Dean Morgan portrayed him perfectly, and I always felt like there was more too him than he let on. The small glimpse of John we saw in the pilot was so different then the John we saw after his wife’s death, and because of that I knew that he never accepted her death. I think that maybe he felt like he could get her back if he just tried hard enough. I understood that even more when Matt Cohen took on the role of a young John. I think I needed those flashbacks to fully understand John Winchester.

This is no excuse for how he treated Sam and Dean, but John because a different John when Mary died. Hard, and bitter, and desperate. But he also knew that he couldn’t put on a mask, and pretend like everything was okay. Because it wasn’t. He had to teach his kids how to protect themselves, because they meant the world to him and he couldn’t have anything bad happen to them.

I just think that he did it in the wrong way. 

Do you really want the answer for that question, you little pervert? c:

Ehm, no not really. 

Well, I love my cats. And you’ll get the picture under a read more in a few short moments.